An act of defiant grace

Came upon Stoop app for reading newsletters and was intrigued until I saw the bit that says “trusting an algorithm with deciding what you read is like trusting a nutritionist who gets paid based on how many chips you eat”. Uhm, no? If you want to use the nutritionist analogy, pretty soon you are going to be suggested to eat products sourced from the companies in their network, because face it, it serves both them and you. I think I am pretty much done with algorithmic recommendations these days and besides, it looks and has the possibility to turn into my Instapaper app where the newsletter I subscribed would be backed for months. I’m sure some other people might find it useful, but again it’s another utility fallacy — it requires habit reshaping more so than another technology which features we are going to compare to its predecessors. I also couldn’t stop thinking, what’s next after newsletters? We have gone from forums to blogs to social media as microblogs and now we are writing longform in newsletters, whilst all of the rest still prevail somehow. It’s definitely an interesting trend to watch.

Something completely different: Nick Cave’s advice on how to forgive someone who has done something terrible to you — something I have been struggling with, as years of anxiety had been inflicted upon me. He mentioned of a mother who forgave the murderer of his son, “I forgive you from the bottom of my heart. I pray for you as a mother. You are a child to me”, showing an act of “defiant grace, a refusal to be bowed by the malevolence of the world, and the heightened compassion way beyond the reach of most of us, a saintlike mixture of beauty, lunacy, and courage”.

… try to see the idea of forgiveness as an act of insubordination, a non-compliance to the forces of malevolence, a recognition that you will not be defined by the offence that has been inflicted upon you. See forgiveness as a gift, not to the person who has committed the injury, but to yourself, in the form of self-protection. The sooner you start the process, the less time you may spend imprisoned by resentment and bitterness, hopefully moving toward a more resilient self. To try and fail is in itself a form of betterment. There are times forgiveness is beyond us but still we must reach, still we must strive.

And so I will try, this act of defiant grace.

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